After this message, you will no longer be cool enough to warrant responses to your email. I’m sorry. I tried to like you for a long time, but this just isn’t working. Why don’t you take the next few days to concentrate on the good things about yourself, and if you come up with any, email, text or call me. If they’re good enough, I’ll start emailing you again next Wednesday. Think hard.
Love and kittens,
Sunny
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Imagine getting this if you didn’t know she was away. Welcome to my world. More like Rain and Pain, if you ask me.